Checklist for the First Year of Marriage

Introduction and Overview

An End-of-First Year Marriage Check-Up

(i.e., a really quick survey of your marriage!) Instructions: Fill this out separately and then talk about it with your spouse before you come in. Send it to your pastor a day or two before you meet with him.

1. What are some of the challenging things you’ve faced so far in marriage?

1. What have been the best things about marriage so far? ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. What has surprised you?

For the husband: How would you evaluate your leadership in marriage? Where has

leadership been hard? Where has it been easy? What do you need to change about your leadership? ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Part 2 · Page 2

1. For the wife: How would you evaluate your husband’s leadership in marriage?

1. For the husband: How is your wife doing in following and submitting to you?

For the wife: How are you doing in following and submitting to your husband? Where has submitting and following your husband been hard? Where has it been easy?

1. Are you working from a family budget and if so, how is it going? ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. If you are in a young married (YM) group, how is it going? What has been helpful? What has not been helpful? Do you have any feedback for the staff on your YM group?

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1. How has your sex life been? Do you talk about it? ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. Explain what conflict resolution looks like. Where do you need to grow in this area?

1. What have been strengths and weaknesses in your marital communication?

What things have you done that are contributing problems to the marriage? Take this an opportunity to fight pride, show humility (James 4:6), and take ownership of your sins.

In what ways do you need to be living sacrificially for your spouse (Eph 5:26-28) in which you are NOT doing? Take this as an opportunity to admit your lack of Christ-like, servanthearted behavior, thoughts, and actions in marriage.

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What evidences of God’s grace do you see in your spouse during your first year of marriage?

What are the challenges that come from your job(s) and how are you sorting through them together? ______________________________________________________________________________________________________

In what ways would you like to see your marriage grow in the upcoming year? What goals do you want to set? What areas do you hope to grow in? ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1. Is there anything else that you feel like we should talk about?

1. What things would like talk during your marriage check-up?